The product descriptions at Monki.com will keep you entertained for hours
Whether they're the result of a groupon-esque super-quirky approach to product descriptions, or the legacy left behind by a very bored copywriter, the product descriptions on Swedish brand Monki's online store are a work of postmodern brilliance.
"Isn't it amazing how you can use the same letters and symbols to make something very clear (like this text does), and also to compose perfectly secret messages in a secret code?" cries one blurb, for a dress covered in hashtags, ampersands and various punctuation. On any other website, it would say 'print t-shirt dress in grey jersey'.
Elsewhere, a tie-dye bodycon number poses the question, "Is there order among the constellations, nebulas and planets of the Milky Way, or is it all the result of wild chance and random luck? Does it matter, if it is beautiful?"
They also explain how products came to be. "If you went out one day in your white dress, and an indigo rain started falling, soaking your shoulders and arms, you might end up with something like this... " This being ombre denim. We like the sound of indigo rain, though. Didn't Prince write a song about that once? Oh, wait...
A t-shirt emblazoned with 'LOL' carries the descriptions "Rats" spelled backwards makes "star", but "lol" just makes "lol"... Surely that must mean something?" while one pair of leggings apparently "look like what your legs feel like when your favourite song comes on." OK then.
Our favourite, though, is one form-fitting mini dress described as having "Bleached colours, like a leopard left in the sun too long, and cut into as shapely a fit as if an angel had held the scissors."
That angel clearly dropped the scissors and grabbed a computer keyboard soon after.
Bravo, Monki. You definitely made us smile. And also consider buying the skirt with the dogs on.