Technically, this baby is the 'off shoulder dress', but let's be honest. If you buy it and wear it out (particularly with a friend who doesn't 'get' fashion) it will instantly become 'the wallpaper dress'. Or possibly 'the sofa dress'.

In the late 90s, my mother taught me to sew, and we would go to Birmingham rag market to snap up cheap fabric to make dresses. Often we would struggle to find decent stuff amongst all the heavy furnishing fabrics, and I would end up in dresses that looked like tablecloths. Back then, making clothes out of home furnishings still had too much of a Maria Von Trapp connection. I'll never forget the catty girl I met on holiday saying to me "is that the dress you made? Because it looks like it."


But Topshop have a little more experience than me, and this dress definitely looks like it's been made from a fabric originally headed for homebase. But somehow, it works. Add a pair of statement Nicholas Kirkwood shoes and a little white jacket, and you're set. It's £70, and available now.